Friday, April 08, 2005

Lee Atwater, DeLay's Spiritual Advisor - really, I am NOT kidding!

(---from CBS, those left-wingers that we so adore!)
Dotty Lynch is the Senior Political Editor for CBS News. E-mail your questions and comments to
Political Points

From time to time, Political Points gets memos from the late Lee Atwater, who is continuing his work inside the pearly gates. He last checked in during the presidential race when he told the GOP to pump up Howard Dean and get those anti-war photos of Kerry and Jane Fonda out there. Now he is starting to get concerned about Tom DeLay. Note to bloggers: This memo came from an extra-terrestrial source and was NOT circulated on the floor of the Senate.

To: Tom Delay

From: Lee Atwater

Re: Where We Go From Here

Hey guy. Looks like that seedy liberal media is at it again. (Good word, Tommy, seedy; throw that slime stuff right back at them.) When The New York Times and Washington Post decide to go after you on the front page on the same day you know its show-time. Nothin' better for our direct mail and grassroots than having those guys to kick around. But when the Wall Street Journal pops off like they did last week, using words like "unsavory whiff" and "odor" it may be time to think a little about where to go from here.

1. Stay close to home. Travel is fun and broadening but $70,000 for a trip to the UK? The green fees and St Andrews are high but that's a real stretch. And $100,000 to South Korea? I mean how much kimchi can you eat? And now another $57,000 trip to Moscow? I didn't even know there were golf courses in Moscow. Stick to day trips around Houston for a while. Maybe do a few Habitats for Humanity. The pope's funeral is a good gig but don't have too much fun in Rome. They are gunning for you and there are paparazzi everywhere over there.

2. Get some new friends. It's nice to keep up with generous old pals and staffers like Jack Abramoff, Michael Scanlon and Ed Buckham, but those goo-goos think they mix a bit too much business with politics.

3. Watch out for your old enemies. Yes, you know you have them. Remember old John Boehner, who you got toppled after the '98 election? I keep reading that he is now "quietly positioning himself" to take over if you "decide" to step aside. And leaking all that nasty stuff about Roy Blunt and his friend the tobacco lobbyist could come back to bite you. And then there's Newt Gingrich's boy Bob Walker, who you beat for whip in '94. He's out there looking for some lobbying business. You might want to throw some crumbs to him. I mean Scanlon and Buckham seem to have more than enough for leftovers. And don't ignore Coach Hastert. Some think he may be getting a little tired of being referred to as your puppet.


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